How to Write an Obituary: A PSA

I read a lot of obituaries for my job, and there are a few things that I'd like to address. Obituaries are a great way to memorialize a loved one who has passed on. I'm not really saying that there's a right or a wrong way to write one, but for someone who spends A LOT of time reading them, I have a few thoughts.*

First and most importantly, please, please, PLEASE include the date of birth and the date of death in the obituary. I can't tell you how frustrating it is to read an obituary with out these vital dates in them. And in my own personal opinion, what's the point of even writing an obituary if you aren't going to tell us when they died?

It is always lovely for people in my profession (don't you love how pretentious that sounds?) when an obituary writer includes all of the children's names, their spouses (if applicable) and their current city of residence. I do realize that some newspapers charge you by the word, so if you need to make it a bit shorter feel free to leave off the current city. But please keep the complete names in there. Please.

This may surprise you, but an obituary is not the place to take passive-aggressive (or plain outright) jabs at your sister, your step-mother, your brother or your aunt. Or any other family member for that matter. Especially not the person who is deceased. As highly entertaining as it is for the reader to have a peek into your family turmoil, you'd be much better off airing your dirty laundry elsewhere. (Perhaps a reality TV show?)

If possible, avoid having the deceased person write their own obituary. (Before they pass away, obviously). I get that it's unique (except that lots of people do it, so not really) and there may be some things that they want included in there, but when I'm reading an obituary written by the deceased person it feels like I'm reading a stranger's diary, and it's just a bit uncomfortable. Plus these obituaries rarely include death dates (see above).

You may be wondering how to make an obituary interesting, as well as a worthy tribute to the deceased. There are several possible ways to go about this. My personal favorite is the inclusion of a unique or interesting story or fact about the person, or something you loved about them. Notice that I said unique or interesting, not bizarre or ultra-personal. Somethings are best not shared with the public. A good rule of thumb is to only include things you would feel comfortable posting on Facebook. Wait, I take that back. Just don't say anything that you feel the deceased person wouldn't want shared with the world.

Other Tips:
Include a picture if you can. Preferably one that the deceased person would feel good about. Pictures are a nice touch, and they get the reader to be a bit more invested.
Marriage dates are always nice. Not quite as vital as birth or death dates, but still nice to know.
Finally an obituary is not about you. It's about the person who passed away, and it's your job to honor them in the best way you can.

And now I present to you my Favorite Obituary of All Time:

 Practically perfect in every way.

Love, Brontë

*This is (as always) my opinion. Not intended to be offensive in the slightest.